Monday, January 10, 2011


Today was a good day, considering I started a new job which wad definitely an answered prayer to say the least. However, I'm not here to talk at all about today and the relatively boring day of training I had that accompanies the first day (or in this case 3 weeks) of work. This blog is to talk about a realization I had last night.

Give me release
Witness me
I am outside
Give me peace

Heaven holds a sense of wonder
And I wanted to believe
That I'd get caught up
When the rage in me subsides

In this white wave
I am sinking
In this silence
In this white wave
In this silence
I believe

That's Silence by Delerium. It may be one of my favorite house songs of all time, but once again besides the point. As I was laying in my bed last night, I was unable to sleep. I spent an hour staring at the ceiling trying to sleep, then an hour and a half playing video games to tire myself out again (I was already tired) and still couldn't get to sleep for another half hour. I started the process at midnight, so if you kept track, I fell asleep at three. I had to get up at 6:30...

Durint that time, I got to realize something. Life is too loud. We wake up in the morning to an alarm as loud as we can possibly make it. Turn on the TV. Get in our cars and listen to the radio, go to work and find ways to keep ourselves busy and listening to things and we never take time for ourselves. When we do, however, we veg out in front of the TV watching a movie, playing games, or on the computer for hours on end. Don't get me wrong, I love all three of those things, but what is that doing for my sanity? Hell, what is that doing for my spiritual walk?

11 The LORD said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.” Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. (I Kings 19:11-13a)

God came to Elijah after all the noise, all the trouble, in the Silence. Are we seeking the silence for ourselves? For our sanity? For our lives? And if we have some of the silence, are we using it or are we wasting it away with everything else?

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